am i a fool to believe in this? to believe that this God is real, and to live life for Him is indeed worthy?
if i really do believe that this is worth it then why do i lead my life in this fashion? lukewarm, tepid. transformation has occurred and yet, at best, i am a frog swimming deep in the water unaware that i am no longer a tadpole. until i begin to lose my breath, my lungs collapse, and i force myself up, and take a gasp of air. it is only then when i realize that perhaps i was meant to live above the suffocating waters--but no, i will return to my familiar drowning.
my God, my God. be near.
i will pray, rededicate, redevote
for You alone are worthy.
what is familiar and comfortable i will leave behind
for what is worthy.
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